It’s so unsettling.
You’re reviewing Facebook or LinkedIn when you receive a suggestion to friend or connect with someone who has passed away.
I never know quite how to deal with this.
And it brings up so many emotions and questions.
Did their families leave their Facebook page online on purpose? Have they even thought about it? Do you think the deceased person would want to be featured online forever? Facebook does offers the family the option of memorializing the individual.
This might be an uncomfortable conversation, but these social media decisions should probably be discussed by family members at the time they plan their wills or do their estate planning. This sounds trivial, until it’s not trivial any more.
And what’s my role as an innocent bystander? Maybe the surviving spouse or partner doesn’t realize their loved one is still online? I would not feel comfortable sending them a note to make them aware—but maybe I’m wrong.
A female friend recently passed away. Many women in my age group are active on Facebook—but many of their husbands are not. I’m not sure her husband knows how to sign onto Facebook.
The Internet and social media have changed so many things about life and death. I used to find out about people’s deaths by reading the obituaries in the newspaper. Now I’m much more likely to be notified by e-mail or Facebook. And when I hear about a death on Facebook, is it appropriate to go to the deceased person’s site and show my respect? Many people do. And it certainly doesn’t seem appropriate to “like” the announcement.
Facebook members are generally young and proportionately few have died, but that is quickly changing. What will happen 20 or 30 years? Will there be as many dead people on Facebook as live people?
A current hot TV show on AMC is The Walking Dead—that soon could describe Facebook.
David Sher is a co-founder of Buzz12 Advertising. You can read more of his posts by looking for the “David Sher Posts” category in the sidebar of Buzz12’s website.